Monday, October 27, 2008

anti smoking ads..

After the ban on smoking in public places is on and a lot of debate is doing the rounds in newspapers, I saw this bit and quite liked it........

From Blogger Pictures

From Blogger Pictures


Its easy enough to abandon your past and just live,
though only the desolate are granted this form of emptiness called Freedom.
Kazuya Minekura

Tuesday, October 21, 2008


Very often I have encountered feminism being equated with hatred towards men. Its time we understand what feminism is? Feminism cannot be defined in two or three lines. It’s a movement. Feminism vouches for gender equality – equal rights, equal opportunities, equal say in matters pertaining to all the walks of life. Feminism is about fighting gender oppression.

Feminism is not about male bashing....its about equality and creating a society where women can stand up to themselves and equal to men...not above or below them but WITH them....feminists don't hate men. they hate patriarchy. they hate oppression.

Feminism is about helping women understand their rights... understanding themselves and their freedom..... Feminism is a movement. It was started by various people across the globe at various times to voice against the cruelty against India, Raja Ram Mohan Roy and Mahakavi Bharathiar were men who supported for women's education and opposed sati a cruel practice where a wife is forced to jump in to the fire after the death of her husband.......And in India these people are called as feminists.....

Feminism is the doctrine advocating social, political, and all other rights of women equal to those of has got nothing to do with hating men................

FEMINISM is supporting women to think, act independently irrespective of social barriers(mostly created for men's pleasure). Gender roles are social constructions and feminism aims at fighting against those unfair practices that curb the rights and freedom of woman. Its about letting a girl treasure her childhood, enjoy her youth and live life according to her wish and not under any kind of oppression. Its about equal say in the family, in the society and in the world.

The Mindgames

Today I was over hearing a conversation between two girls seated in front of me in the bus.One of them was depressed and the other one was counseling her and repeatedly accusing her friend of thinking from the heart which leads to problems in her life. Now this caught my attention. We often talk about thinking from the heart and the head….it is commonly believed or atleast we all talk about in our daily conversations that people who supposedly are considered to think from the heart wear their emotions on their sleev whereas others who are considered to be more practical ones are not emotinal in their decisions and are good decision makers blah blah & blah... I mean, come on do we think from the heart??

Its all in the mind…..all our emotions are mindgames. Its our mind, our head that controls whatever we do and not our heart. Its pure simple logic which has been thrown out of the window in our conversations. All our emotions- love, hate, jealousy, attachment, detachment, sadness, happiness, anxiety, pressure- its all in the mind. Our mind is the controlling factor and not the heart. Wonder why that such a strong emotion like love is considered to be from the heart where in actuality or scientifically heart has no role to play.It is from our own will that we feel a particular emotion be it any. It is we who allow ourselves to love, hate,envy or feel jealousness towards aomeone. Its all in our mind and mind controls our emotions.

As I am trying to put it in words my feeling is changing from a thought to amusement for biologically heart is just an organ that controls other organs and blood circulation. It does not control our emotions…, hate is not from the heart….and ha ha…we all believe that it’s the heart at fault!!! It’s the heart that breaks..!! not realizing its our own mindgames, our will, our decisions that makes us do what we do….

Its all in the mind……

Never regret any thing,

bcoz at one time it was what you wanted......

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

sometimes its important to feel the pain

Yesterday, I came to know that an old friend of mine was in shambles!! I mean what do you do when 6 months into your marriage and that too a love marriage, you realize that your spouse is into an extra- marital affair….its scary. Its like turning your world upside down…..its a cyclone, a hurricane, I don’t know what but one thing I am certain of is that it blows away every shred of peace from your life. I would expect anyone to be hysterical here. But this woman was exactly the opposite. I wouldn’t say she was calm but she was numb, neutral ….not feeling the pain. Pain is important in our life. I wouldn’t wish her the pain but here I feel its important to feel the pain, to help you come to terms with the disaster and give a reality check . Otherwise what she is going through is worse or will be worse in the long run…escaping, rationalizing, sublimating the wrong/ the reality….she is not feeling the pain…the pain of a failed marriage, a failed trust.

Even psychology says that feeling of pain and crying are symptoms that the shock has been acknowledged and being accepted by the person. Repeated grieving in such situations reflects that the person is on the process of internalization of the pain and will learn to move on with the reality.

When ever we feel pain, it is also accompanied by a hope, a wish that things should fall back in place and be as before. Its this hope and this optimism that keeps us going. Its that human tendency to see good and positive that we wish, we hope, we pray and we grieve. Sometimes it is important to feel the pain instead of wishing it away because the alternative is much worse. Its hope that keeps us moving forward for if there is no hope there isn’t life. Life can’t be seen in black and white. It is more of grey that matters and makes life the way it is. It’s the grey that reflects the journey from black to white. And it’s the grey that holds the precious moments of our life, the struggles, the anxiety, the tension, the ray of hopes, the smiles…..that makes life worth living.

It makes me realize how happiness and pain are two side of the same coin..its important to feel the pain to relish the happiness in our lifes.

“I have had dreams and I have had nightmares,
but I have conquered my nightmares
because of my dreams.”


Sunday, October 12, 2008

random thoughts

just feeling a little restlessness inside me.....want to write but don't know what...
had a goood day..its sunday and the diwali cleaning up has started in the house..its one of those times of the year that I wait for....not that I am a cleanliness freak...actually m the most devoted procrastinator in the family when it comes to cleaning and other household work :)
but this safai time pre- diwali ...I enjoy it....coz its the time all of us get together to ensure there are no pests and dirt in the house...its fun when all of us get together..there no end to the stupid pj's that start cracking up and leg pulling...:)) so today the day was spent driving the cockroaches off the house....poor souls..I do not how many I murdered today...!

nothing on t.v ...m sick of repeated telecasts of every damn show...ddlj was being aired...m surprised I wasn't enjyn it....have I grown over ddlj or have I actually grown up out of that dreamy lala land....don't know but both sound equally disappointing to me....

didn't feel like talking to any friend didn't try calling up anyone... work tomorrow...I think I should doze off...but don't feel like...

last time caught up with a rahul bose movie....ANURANA...I hope I have got the name right...interesting it is....he was right....all relationships can't be given a name....its kinda true....complex. every relationship binds us and draws a line that stops us from making new ones....will write more on this later...

a friend just messaged....he wants to catch up with a movie....hmm...have figured out a time..lets see....after college going out for movies has become more of a priviledge...its rarely that I go for movies now.....oh what fun days in college we had...miss u guys...

I just realised that when ever we look back in life, we always think of the happier times we had...we dont want to think about bad times in any situation..its kinda good also...but past always brings smiles and it should....for all of us....amen.

my thoughts are wandering....I think I better let go...

Good Night!

Friday, October 10, 2008

Donate life....

When I was a kiddo I used to see that Ash n Big B promo on tv about eye donation....thats for the first time I learnt about eye donation and what is it.....I even heard my mom saying at times to donate her eyes when the inevitable comes...but down the line and many years, it was all forgotten...the roller coaster world had taken a toll on all of us....but many years later when I was sitting absolutly idle at home and trying hard to make the hours pass by...all of a sudden it struck me if it was like an insight....all those thoughts and I decided to take an wasn't at all difficult for me....I mean the was as if I just have to do it with no second thoughts....the conviction was very strong...I called up 2-3 medical practs and decided to register myself in a hospital close to the nest where I get back after hard dayz work....the counsellor was warm and inviting person who explained to me everything about organ donation and how my family needs to be well aware of my decision. I came back home and my folks had no objections but they just asked me to be sure about myself.....I was and my decision was given the final stamp..... it was a day before my birthday and probably the best gift I gave myself was a feeling I cannot explain and I'll not even try to...:)

now I proudly carry the donor's card in my wallet...

Life is precious. Too precious, to be lost to an organ failure. But millions have lost their lives when a vital organ failed to function in their body.

Organ and tissue donors leave a miraculous legacy. They are living proof that death can bring life, that sorrow can turn to hope, and that a terrible loss can become the greatest gift of all. Every day they lead us on a journey of hope, renewal, and transformation.

I humbly request to who so ever reading this...go ahead and donate your organs...

Let someone live a life after you are gone.....

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Wednesday, October 8, 2008

can't think of a title....

what I'll be putting down next is old, circulated millions of times over emails and sms but what the heck...I just love it!!

A turkey was chatting with a bull.

'I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree' sighed the turkey, 'but I haven't got the energy.'

'Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?' replied the bull. They're packed with nutrients.'

The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the top most branch of the tree.

Now the turkey was proudly perched at the top of the tree, he was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him out of the tree.

Moral of the story
Bull Shit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there!!!

okay, here goes another one.....

A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field.

While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him.

As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was and soon began to sing for joy.

A passing cat heard the bird singing and following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.

Moral of the story

(1) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy.

(2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.

(3) And when you're in deep shit, it's best to keep your mouth shut!

Wednesday, October 1, 2008

Eid Mubarak!

Yesterday while coming back from work, I was having a conversation with my dad as to how the recent bomb blasts have spread the terror. The conversation arose after crossing Kalkaji temple where unexpectedly the traffic moved smoothly and was not snarled. There was no rush of devotees.It was somewhat strange for me for I have been crossing that road for years and during navratras, the traffic moves at its own pace there, thanks to the mela, the devotees thronging the temple and the processions outside which as always leads to chaos on the road. I was disappointed for the first time to not to have stuck in a traffic jam!

It was a special day yesterday which marked the last day of ramzan and the first day of navratras. I am all smiles when I see festivals occurring on the same day. Its not that I have the time to celebrate all festivals but still, I guess it brings with it a sense of warmth….to me at least! Its beautiful to see how the common people of diverse religions co-exist and celebrate in bliss as against the belief of the politico.

As for my own experience, living in a city like Delhi which has no culture of its own, one meets people from different religions and different beliefs. I do participate in Eid celebrations at my friend’s place and so do they on Diwali at my house. And we do like to leave behind these differences between muslims and hindus created by the managers of the country and publicized mindlessly by the media most of the times.
Infact, here I would want to share another beautiful example of religious co-existence. My work takes me to a school in a slum colony in Delhi where the occupants are muslims and hindus. Interacting with their children in school for about 6 months, I thought how simple it is a matter which has been maligned to the hilt by the known and the not so known of the country. In the short span of my work there, I happened to celebrate Rakhsha bandhan, Ramzan,Eid, Navratras and Diwali there. It was fascinating to see that raksha bandhan was celebrated with equal joy and warmth in both hindu and muslim households. During the ramzan time, children in school ensured that their friends who were observing rozas were feeling fine and comfortable. Children made it a point that they sit under the fan in the class so that it will be easier for them to beat the heat. And these were kids not more than 12 yrs of age. Both during navratras and ramzan, children shared the happenings at home and visiting each other home was a regular practice. I was enchanted. Both Eid and Diwali were celebrated with equal jest and warmth.

What else should we ask for. These are the households where the ‘not- so-educated’ live but the way they live, I salute them and the kind of values that they are imbibing in their children is appreciable. This is the way it should be….for our country, for the world.

Considering the present scenario, everyone around me is predicting riots and war. All I can say is that its very simple to co-exist harmoniously, if only politicians would let us.

It reminds me of a slogan : ‘Peace is not the way, peace is the only way.’

Eid Mubarak!

office affairs

Office affairs was the last thing I would have thought of a few days before till my friend gave me an honest confession. It was like a split wide open…and yeah it has gone quite sour…it is extremely difficult to work with someone whom you don’t know as to whether you are to love or to hate after you have been treated like a tissue and in a state of mind that is emotionally unstable and vulnerable towards a person at this point. It was a trap he had laid and she succumbed to it, easily letting go of her wisdom and good advice which she is quite capable of giving others. So at this point of time, she’s in a terrible state of mind.

All I can ask my guiding light is for some more wisdom to her and to me to help her out of this mess.