random captures....

awesome weather

the weather has been just awesome since past 2 days...its getting colder....the woolens are out.....i
m taking the longer routes to get home...just to enjoy the cold breeze and watch people.....i dread winters but for this weather m just loving it!!!!!
missing someone....;)

my diary

Dear ....

Its been time that we have known each other. I never completely trusted you. There have always been unanswered questions about you in my mind. But still I wanted to trust you. Four of us have spent some really awsome mast times together be it hanging out at the malls or just walks....as u say 'great times spent'. I always knew that u have been hiding things from me. But i chose to ignore it and was glad that u were sharing those things with me that u culd not trust anybody else with. M thankful to you for keeping that faith in me. But you never let me do that with you.
But after that day I have lost all the respect that I had for you. The path that you have taken on is in absolute contradiction to my values. I cannot accept you like that.
I hate you.
I still wish that all of us be together again but I know that can never ever happen now.
We need to loosen our strings and let each other go our ways.
For the betterment and peace for all of us.

restaurants??

we were as usual hanging out and M suggested that we go for a proper meal in a good restaurant instead of getting into a fast food joint or a cafe that we usually do. I hated the idea. I am too hesitant of eating in these high end formal restaurants as I call them. The look and the ambience of it makes me uncomfortable though people love these. I would never enter a Ruby Tuesday or a TGIF or Mainland China. everything at these places comes to me as so structured and organised. I would pretty much be happy at grabbing a meal at Yo China or stare at people across glasses at Barista or CCD. These are places where i can be myself, laugh out loud and do just anything. love the feel of these places...casual, cool, bindass. Proper restaurants means sitting properly, well laid out napins and cutlery, somebody serving you, no messing up with food n ketchups..oh so boring.....well we go out to enjoy and have fun ...right!

Infact bestest moments with food have been roadside ones for me.....hot boiled eggs from the thale wala bhaiya on a cold winter night, steamed momos from the local kiosk, chatpati tikki from the ghar ke pass wala halwai, kathi rolls from kiosks again, matke wale chole kulche, khana from dhabas on highways, hostel ki gandi kitchen ki mast chai, canteen ki maggi....aha...kya mazaa ata hai.....churi kante se ac restaurant mein baith kar khane mein kya rakha hai doston.......enjoy the street food......slurp!

just updates.

there's a lot about me that nobody knows....nobody and i can not and do not want to expalin it to them . but i wish i could share.....i know i can share it with P but i do not have the guts to do so...dark secrets are difficult to open up....she would understand why i do not want to get married now.

i have started making stupid blunders again. its strange but this phase comes in , reoccurs . i start making mistakes n that too illlogical n stupid in nature which i myself cannot understand why and become a cause not of embarrasement but absolute stupidity and mindlessness. its making me feel guilty.

for friends- most of them have a constant complain. i make plans to meet up and call off at the last moment. at times it is mood swing , laziness but mostly its genuine reasons. i wish all my good friends could understand this. but those who do and still love me are my gooody goody friends...so what if i couldn't attend my best friends marriage....i know she understands or cancelled off major plans at last moments.....we all still in touch and going good.

i wish i could apply my brains a little more.

feeling too stressed out these days....lot of work and laziness leaves all my work unfinished and then i have to rush. result.....stress.

my hod is getting on my nerves these days...she's irking me...can't she be a better manager..it would ease off so much of work..but no..why would she do that...i m starting to hate her.

mad over donuts

I have always hated donuts….HATED….even the face of it….I hated lukn at them….it always seems such a heavy thing tooo sweet for the mouth with loads of chocolate dripped over it…..i luv chocolate in all its forms but somehow that liquid chocolate poured over donuts would make me feel puky…..seriously.

But from quite some time…people have been recommending me to have donuts from ‘MAD OVER DONUTS’. I was strolling at one of these happening malls in the city with O and we went into the food court without any intentions of binging on smthing. But right at the entrance we spotted MOD. We luked at it and then went on about insulting donuts to heights!!! After we had done our hatefill over donuts, I just mentioned how people have been praising MOD. He agreed in, we gave each other a witty smile and seconds later, we were at the MOD counter trying to choose our donut out of the so many kept there….i was trying to avoid the ones dripping with choc sauce but O insisted on having those ones…I wonder why….so after all that crappy insistence I went in for ‘nuts over donuts’…donut with choc sauce and beautifully covered up with loads of nuts and O choose a milky chocolate one….i have to agree that these donuts were really pleasing to look at as against the horrifying ones I have always had to lay my eyes on…..so we grabbed a seat and then grabbed the holey things into our mouths……and trust me the experience was heavenly…..the donuts were extremely fresh, warm and fluffy. The sweetness was just apt which is very rare….especially when it comes to sweet stuff…

And I relished every bite of that donut. O suggested for having another grab but I declined for it would have been too much…… m not too choosy with food….n neither m I a food lover….but I must say that m in love with these donuts….and I’ll be going in for a second time sooooon……..

my dads' really angry....

its been more than a week my dad and me havn't been talking.....he brought up the marriage issue again and i bluntly said no.....he just walked off in anger....and we havn't been looking in the eye since then......and i havn't slept this whole week.

all my life, all these years i have made every attempt trust me EVERY thing i can to not to annoy my dad. i have given up things he didn't like me doing be it about friends or going out or whatever. i wouldn't do things which i know he'll not like.....n i admit i havn't cared so much about my mom's permissions as about my dad's.

his not talking to me is really making me weak. i have had a proper sleep since then and its been 9 days and the only thing on my mind 24*7 is the issue of marriage. m i wrong in saying a no to this life long so called sacred commitment?? my reasons that i am not ready yet, i need more time and that i do not feel the need to get married right now do not convince them.

i do not find anything wrong. i am 25....and i do not feel the need to get married is an absolutely strong reason for me to say a 'no'. i do not find marriage a necessity. for me it is not something that HAS TO BE DONE. i did like to do it if i genuinely feel the need for it. its a big thing..its a big commitment..its about sharing lifes and am i supposed to do it just coz its the next step in life?????
also i do not like the baggage that marriage brings along......a new family, me being expected to be the responsible one, in-laws, the cooking stuff and then babies...uff.....i don' think m made for it.....

according to my folks, m absolutely on the border of crossing the marriageable age. one more year and i will be making life difficult for them and myself.

in my head...i know m right....but my decision has spoilt the air at home....its just so uncomfortable.....and everybody...friends, parents, cousins, aunts, uncles...everyone is making me feel as if m wrong....

am i wrong?

everybody says its just the anxiety and fear of marriage that i have and m giving stupid reasons for it......i don't think so.

m hating this tussle with my dad...should i give in....?

blah blah!

hah..i realize i havn't been blogging for a while now...n the quality of my posts is darkening...
well life is getting quite monotonous. the only change being ghar wale getting too serious abt my shadi.....uff this is soo damn *******. i dnt want to do it.......
alrite i might do it if
1. m not asked to cook coz dats the thing i HAAAAAAAAATE the most....so please keep me out
of the kitchen....
2. dont expect me to be the sati savitri...i have a life too.
3. why should i leave my parents off to go and do seva for his??????
4. i need to sleep at night.
5. i dn't want babies....i just so hate them.
6. dnt expect me to be wearing all that glitter n gold....m too comfi in my kurtas n floaters.
7. m not gonna get into any religious dramas n rituals in the name of religion.
8. if u switch jobs out of cities, dnt expect me to tag along....i dnt expect you to do the same for
me.....


i have more to add but is this sounding tooo adamant.....if it is good!
pls suggest ways to shhooo off the opportunities!!!

tv is getting so boring these days.....esp weekends.....mein kya karun.......

TEACHERS..........

In India 5th September is celebrated as Teachers' day. 5th September is the birthday of a great teacher Dr. Sarvapalli Radhakrishnan. When Dr. Radhakrishnan became the president of India in 1962, some of his students and friends approached him and requested him to allow them to celebrate 5th September, his "birthday". In reply, Dr, Radhakrishnan said, "instead of celebrating my birthday separately, it would be my proud privilege if September 5 is observed as Teachers' day". The request showed Dr.Radhakrishnan's love for the teaching profession. From then onwards, the day has been observed as Teachers' Day in India.

Socrates was an example of a good teacher as he considered himself a learner as well as a teacher. For Socrates, love and friendship were the proper contexts for the pursuit of wisdom and goodness. Socrates saw himself only as a catalyst. He felt that a personality influences another and a teacher should be capable of moulding his students through the power of his personality.

Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi was the pre-eminent political and spiritual leader of India during the Indian independence movement. He was the pioneer of satyagraha—resistance to tyranny through mass civil disobedience, firmly founded upon ahimsa or total non-violence—which led India to independence and has inspired movements for civil rights and freedom across the world. He strongly believed in practice before you preach. Gndhi’s believes have influenced and inspired people across the globe.

Sir Isaac Newton is one of the most renowned physicists of all times, Sir Isaac Newton is also credited as a great mathematician, astronomer, natural philosopher, alchemist, and theologian. Through his Philosophiæ Naturalis Principia Mathematica, he laid down the groundwork for most of classical mechanics.
Pythagoras is regarded as one of the greatest mathematicians that the world has seen till date. He is also credited with being a great mystic and scientist. He founded the religious movement called Pythagoreanism and also gave the world Pythagorean Theorem, which is used in mathematics till date.


Raja Ram Mohan Roy is considered to be one of the great teachers of Modern India. He is known as the 'Maker of Modern India'. He was the founder of the Brahmo Samaj, one of the first Indian socio-religious reform movements. And played a major role in abolishing the orthodox rituals like Sati and Idol worship. Raja Rammohan Roy was a great scholar and an independent thinker. He advocated the study of English, Science, Western Medicine and Technology. He was given the title 'Raja' by the Mughal Emperor

Rabindranath Tagore was a writer and a poet. He was also an educationist and his philosophy of education was in complete opposition to the school system. He believed in learning directly and through experiences with nature rather than books. He believed in complete freedom of the child and thought that education should aim at all round development and not produce scholars. His school in Shantiniketan in a reflection of his believes.

John Taylor Gatto was an advertising copywriter who became bored with the ad business started teaching ''just to see what it was like.'' He ended up teaching for 30 years and tried to change the system simply by refusing to follow it. His insights and knowledge have brought a new breath of healing air into the closed classrooms of United States.
Maria Montessori tried to break away from the regular classroom teaching and developed a system of education for children of three to six, based on freedom of movement, the provision of considerable choice for pupils, and the use of specially designed activities and equipment. She is known for her play-way methods and use of sensory experiences for teaching.

World Teacher’s Day is celebrated across the world on 5th October, with great verve and enthusiasm. Ever since the importance of teachers has been recognized by UNESCO, by adopting the “Recommendation concerning the status of teachers”, World Teacher’s Day has been celebrated annually. This includes celebrations to honor the teachers for their special contribution in a particular field area or the community in general.

Silence

Sitting on this side
My eyes hunt for the shore on the other
I can see the clouds
Dim sunlight filtering through them
And giving it the sparkling
Orange lining in the dusky sky.

The water of the ocean
Is playing with vibes
Blues with silver streaks
Glowing orange gems
It makes me wonder
Why are illusions so fascinating?

Through the vast expanse of the ocean
My eyes see water till the farthest point
Its pristine and peaceful
Yet my eyes search for land.
Its queer
The silence that I have loved so much
Is troubling me today.