blah blah!

well had a fantabulous weekend....it was the warming up ceremony for my cousin's new shop....which means a get together with all relatives n cousins...and lot of work n exhaustion!!
i can see a change in me.....i sacrificed my only dearest holiday to go there rather than catching up with my dearest sleep....m enjoying the company of my relatives unlike earlier....or is it beacuse my friends have gone away..or is it coz it gives a break from the usual work day schedule....i guess all..;)

again i faced the same situation where all my extended family just casually sat around n attacked me...well counselled me.....well coaxed me....to get married!!! phew....but i have learnt to react in a mature away...earlier they talk about it n i would be in rage.....now i handle it all with a smile on my face....i have become confident of the fact that their talking n cribbing can't change my decision....so my being so calm yesterday confused them a bit!!!...yipppppppie!!!
sorry ma n pa...m not ready for it yet......i can't understand marriage....i dnt want to marry coz every body does....that just doesn't convince me....i need to feel the need to get maaried deep inside....i can't do it just for the sake of it....
n about my growing up n age factor.....i dnt know what to say....i understand that as parents they might be right n worried....but am i wrong???

well i have joined school...n m stuck in that damn rigid system again...i know i never wanted to teach in a school...but destiny has its way.....what i hate the most is i can't keep shouting at students all the time n restricting them form doing n things....i just love being friends with them....but neither the system nor the students are geared up for this.....m learning to adjust....

i need to loose weight.....

m rediscovering a few relationships....n m glad :)

m still waiting for my results ..fingers crossed.....

the restless monkey inside me tells me that the change that is coming up is for good....inshaallah

tagged!!!

Shayari tagged me with this! ..i know its coming very late...but well....here it goes..

It's all about listing 25 random things about oneself. Well here I go about it.

1. I hate guests at home for it counts for a lot of formalities n those artificial smiles..

2. I just absolutely hate to cook!! n I secretly wish for a hubby who loves to cook n I’ll be more than happy to let that load go off my head.

3. I really really vouch for dowry free marriages....no no not even in the name of gifts…

4. I keep on teasing my mom for her superstitions but m growing up to be like her… ;)) I luuv her,adore herbut I dnt wanna be like her…

5. I just luv sitting under the stars, watching sunsets..…there’s nothing like it .

6. m 24 n still not very convinced about my professional choice…

7. m a big time sleepoholic…n I mean it!

8. I just so much luuuuv that spicy chilli sauce that u get with momos….i always make it a point to beg some extra sauce from the momo guy!! Its yummy…slurp!

9. I have this crazy thing in me….m a mango lover…I just gorge on mangoes during summers n then I crave for them in winters too!!..all the time….!

10. for some people m an introvert,khadus,arrogant person but with some I can just go on talking endlessly!

11. I talk to myself. I talk to myself n I talk to myself….n start thinking that I have conveyed it to the other person…but actually I don’t….n that’s how I mess it all up!!

12. I always end up falling weak in front of the wrong people ;(( I need lots of wisdom on judging people…

13. In my small heart in one small vein I have a desire to learn to play guitar but I can’t even get the sa re ga ma right on my vocals!! I did try learning it, my teacher got fed up n I left it in all embarrassment!!

14. I want to learn to ride a bike!

15. n n n I just need to visit leh…I think it’s the mostest beautifullest( is that a word?) place I have ever known hear of….

16. I just love to listen to all those songs played on radio all night loooooong

17. I just feeling like brutualy murdering when those stupid aunty n uncles try coaxing me into getting married with the famous one-liner
“har ladki ko ek din apne ghar jana hi hota hai…yeh ghar to paraya hai.”
Uff gimme a break….abhi meri umar hi kya hai….n phulez mind ur own life....not mine....

18. n m really proud to say that unlike others girls m the mechanic of my house…from
changing bulbs n tube lights, joining wires, fixing small stuff, dealing with plumbers,
mechanics..i can do it!!

19. I can just never keep my clothes in an order in my closet…every 15 days I religiously
take out all my clothes, fold them n neatly place them in hangers n bundles…but I cannot maintain it…I just ruffle up everything while taking out, picking.choosing what to wear
that after 15 days…its like open the closet n all stuff inside is falling on ur face!!n then
again the cycle repeats!!

20. I suck big time when it comes to managing relatives…

21. I go nuts when I go shopping….when ever I shop I just can’t buy anything…I have to
like it in the first instant look or m not buying it….n this way I end up searching every
damn shop in the whole market n end up home empty haded….and that’s why I usually
go shopping alone!!

22. I like to take the off beaten road…the road that is less traveled….be it profession,
clothes,hobbies,friends…whatever…I don’t like being counted in the heard…though I
don’t want to stand out as well….its like I like to be there n yet be
different….confusing…dnt worry…m a gemini!!

23. when I was a kid I used to luuv cycling…. n I was pretty apt at it….i used to ride very
fast n evry few days some aunty would come home complaining to my grand mom….ha
ha once I banged into a kabadi wala on a blind turn….n he was mad at me for all his stuff lay open on the road n I couldn’t stop laughing….n m thinking of it m giggling even
now!!
Ahh…its now I can connect why I luuv driving so much…n no wonder my dad is so
anxious when m out with his car!!lol….

24. I miss my grandpa…its been 7 yrs n I still think of him n remember those times when I
just loved squeezing into his lap n he used to keep patting on my head in silence…..n u
know he was suffering so much at that time…I actually prayed to God to take him away so that he doesn’t have to bear all that pain…..I miss u a lot daddy…nobody can share
that magic that we had…

25. okay…I think I got too emotional above….n since this is the last one…I shud end it on a happy note….hmmm..ok…..i hav this mad cousin …..whenever he needs to fart he positions his bum bang infront of the face of someone and just farts!! phooooooooooooooo!!
n I have learnt this from him;)))!!!! Try it guys its real fun!!!

please feel free to tag urself!!

colours

within the grey vista of life

happy yet sad

fearing behind smiles

pleasant yet scared

vindicating himself at every criticism

with the wisdom of experience

speaking through his actions

supressing the whirlpool of emotions

hoping for a miracle

to swap his vicissitude

with a plethora of colours.

i want it dat way....

Its coming to me again….its creeping in slowly..i can see it…but m still not able to stop it..deep down I want it come..I can stop it but I know I won’t…it does give me relief…it does take me out of this world ..so what if it brings along a little hurt and a little pain….
I'm waiting for all of it to hit me. I'm waiting for my little fuzzy wisps of happiness to be hushed away by the looming reality of something that I can see but still m blind to it…

heal the world....

this song is on my mind since...


There's a place in your heart, and I know that it is love
And this place could be much brighter than tomorrow
And if you really try, you'll find there's no need to cry
In this place you'll feel, there's no hurt or sorrow
There are ways to get there
If you care enough for the living
Make a little space, make a better place
Heal the world make it a better place
For you and for me and the entire human race

There are people dying if you care enough for the living
Make a better place for you and for me

If you want to know why, there's a love that cannot lie
Love is strong, it only cares for joyful giving if we try
We shall see in this bliss, we cannot feel fear or dread
We stop existing and start living
Then it feels that always love's enough for us growing
So make a better world, make a better world

And the dream we were conceived
In will reveal a joyful face
And the world we once believed in will shine again in grace
Then why do we keep strangling life wound this earth crucify
ts soul though it's plain to see this world is heavenly be God's glow
We could fly so high let our spirits never die in my heart
I feel you are all my brothers create a world with no fear
Together we'll cry happy tears see the nations turn
Their swords into plowshares
We could really get there if you cared enough for the living
Make a little space, to make a better place
For you and for me .......

Wanted...

I have so many things in mind that I want,but I still can't really say that this is really want I want. Infact i want all of it....sslluurrrpp!!!

I have lot of professional dreams. I want them to be fulfilled ASAP.I dn’t want to wait. I am too impatient for that one step at a time theory. I think I need some counseling….

A man who will support my decisions and respect me for who I am. A man who would not expect those ‘a woman has to do this’ stuff from me coz my brain cells have not been engineered that way.

I want some decent bank balance which I can spend lavishly!!( pls dnt bother to ask me to define ‘decent’.)

My stupid friend is getting married and moving on to a different city……gosh….y couldn’t u find some nice guy in our city???.........i’ll miss u P…

I want to go on a holiday every 2 months to a nice hill station and into solace….is that asking for too much??

I want a splendid cook by my side all my life…coz I hate to cook….but I need to eat yummy food. The rats in my stomach have taste buds too….

I am laziness personified….will someone help me get out of this syndrome or u’ll see me knocked out of the house in a few months. :( :(

Will update the list soon…;)